It’s official. Here’s my beautiful new niece:
Paisley Laura Bartholomew
Born October 1, 2005 at 5:17 p.m.
Eight Pounds, Thirteen Ounces, Twenty-One Inches
And she doesn’t look the least bit like Mao Tse-tung or Winston Churchill. As for the extra inch, the tentacles and the laser beam, Charles claims that they were evolutionary analogues or homologues, but I believe he may have meant vestigial characteristics. Either way, it’s very scientific. Moreover, I believe that Paisley may still have these “bonus features” and Charles and Ashley intend to keep this fact secret so that wee Paisley can dwell in safety and relative normalcy until the time she must take over the safeguarding of the Earth as TENTACLE WOMAN.
More very darling pictures of Tentacle Woman – whoops – I mean Paisley are available on Charles and Ashley’s Blog.