Since, as of last week, I have achieved the ripe old age of the square root of 1,296 (yeah, yeah – very thinly veiled way to put it, but I get a kick out of the fact that anyone who is not a savant will have to either actually do math or get out a calculator to figure it out – so there), you’d think I might have achieved a new echelon of sagaciousness. But NO. I just forget names more often and am frequently at a loss for the most basic of words when trying to have a somewhat normal conversation. Wait – I suppose one must have an OLD echelon of sagaciousness in order to achieve a NEW echelon of sagaciousness. Damn. Aye – there’s the rub.

There has been a question bothering me in the last few days, and I evidently have not by sheer age reached the wisdom with which to untangle this mystery. Here’s the question:

WHAT ARE “BOOTSTRAPS,” ANYWAY???

The fact that I am ignorant as to what they ARE means that I shall only continue to have difficulty in any attempt to “pull myself up” by these mysterious items. It also begs the question: Do I even HAVE “Bootstraps?”

I am not so senile as to grasp that I could just Google the phrase or Blingo it (though I haven’t any Blingo friends so it makes me SAD to Blingo – *hint, HINT*). But I’d rather entertain the knowledge and wisdom of those about me. Tell me the truth, perjure yourself – I don’t really care in this instance as long as it’s entertaining. Again, the question du jour is:

WHAT ARE “BOOTSTRAPS,” ANYWAY???

*As far as I know…