Anyone win the lottery recently? I just thought I would offer my services (it’s certainly within my skill set) as someone who can help you get rid of all that pesky extra money. It wouldn’t be any trouble at all.

These are the kinds of things I do for my friends.

NOTE: People at the bank, when they ask if they can “do anything else for you” are not usually amused by my lottery humor. Maybe they just don’t understand its cleverness.